Materialistic Marriages

Materialistic Marriages

Dear Brothers in Islam:

One of the major destruction to 21st century marriage is social media counselors, articles, posts and testimonials.

Marriages is not about how beautiful she is, or how rich she is, or who her family are. It is about how good she is internally and spiritually.

An internally good woman can save you from hellfire and she has the power to change the society from bad to good.

When she produces children, they are the future Aalims and sheikhs.

Beauty is an illusion, so choose for character.

Likewise
Dear Sisters in Islam:

A wealthy man should not be your concern. Because we have seen many wealthy men, but all they give their wives is tension, headaches, and troubles.

Also don't go for his family background or heritage.

Now unfortunately, people are rich, but you don't even know how they accumulate their wealth, halal or haram. Sisters, wish for a gentleman, who is humble, kind and generous, God fearing and spiritual.

He might not make you rich, but he can make you happy forever. And in jannah, he becomes your King and you His queen.

• Some wash their husband's clothes and it works for them. Others don't and amazingly it works for them too.

• Some cook for their husband and it works for them. others don't and shockingly, it works for them.

• Some are full time house wife and it works perfectly for them. others are not and trust me, it also works for them.

• Some know their husband cheats and it works for them. others don't know and don't want to know and it works for them.

• Some contribute to the upkeep of their home and it works for them, others don't and it also works for them.

• Some are in distance relationship and it works for them, others are in a close relationship and it works for them.

• Some sleep in the same room and it works for them, others don't and amazingly it works for them.
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Every relationship works and will only work if everybody understands that no two marriages are the same, no two individuals are exactly the same, and no two situations are exactly the same.

Even when the situations are the same, the individuals are not and even if the individuals are the same,  the circumstances surrounding those marriages are not the same.

We come online daily and read tons of articles about what people do in their marriage, the one that don't wash is calling the one that Washes a slave, the one that washes is calling the one that don't wash bad marriage (wife) material.
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*One of the major destruction to 21st century marriage is social media counselors, articles, posts and testimonies.*

◼What works for you to be happy? 
◼How sure are you that the person you are copying is happy?

My dear, you are not mad, you are not a slave, you are not rude for seeking happiness.

One of your major goal in life  is to seek happiness and peace of mind in your marriage, it can only be gotten if you understand that even if you are world class 1 married to world class 1 you are not the same as your neighbor that her husband also bears her husband.  You are different and unique in your own ways.

Please while you read things online. Please know what works for you. It might sound stupid to others but provided you have peace of mind and you are happy, please stick to it.

Everyone has their own share of challenges that come with marriage and everyone has their different approach to it.

If you must copy, know what you are copying, know who you married, know you are different.

Your marriage is not second hand, fake or outdated because you are not doing what people online says they are doing.

How sure are you that they are doing it? Some will tell you to quit but they have been enduring for years even when theirs is worse than yours.

Please have a mind of your own, know you are different and seek for peace of mind and happiness in your marriage.

It all depends on what works for you.